For the past weeks, I seem to have
been preoccupied condoling with friends and relatives over the death of loved
ones – a nephew, a friend, and then a sister-in-law. Did someone say that sorrow
comes in threes?
Most recently, my husband’s youngest sister, Dr. Nellie Cudal-Defensor, passed away after a lingering illness in her home in Las Vegas,
Nevada. Our last conversation with her over the phone two days before she died
ended with endearing words of love and concern. My husband said, “I love you,
Nellie. Please be strong and stay with us a little bit longer.” And her
response was “I love you, Brother Win, take care of your self.”
Nellie was the youngest of 16
children of the big Cudal clan from Malaybalay, Bukidnon, Philippines. She was
the first member of the family to come to the United States under the Exchange
Visitors Program. As a medical doctor she was able to obtain her licensure to
practice medicine with specialty in Anesthesiology in the State of Illinois. She
was married to a civil engineer, Steve Defensor from Iloilo City; they are
blessed with twin daughters, Marla and Missy.
After Nellie retired from active medical practice she organized a medical group and established the first one-day surgery center in Chicago. Apparently, the center prospered and was a very lucrative source of revenue for the organizers.
Nellie and Steve attained the
American dream, but they didn’t flaunt it. Instead, they silently supported Christian ministries and made use of
their financial resources to help others. Nellie gave much. She shared her
resources with the whole family and to some chosen nephews and nieces who had
the potential to excel in their chosen careers. She petitioned for them and
sent them to college. She invested her hard-earned money on nephews and nieces
who could present to her a viable business plan. Outside of this intra-family
altruism, she and her husband endowed a sizable amount of money to support
advanced theological education of qualified pastors from the Philippines who
are selected to study at the Dallas Theological Seminary in Texas.
One of the beneficiaries of Nellie’s altruism is Dr. Idrenne Alparaque Lim who is currently vacationing with us here in San Diego. Idrenne wanted me to share her tribute to our beloved Nellie whom she fondly calls “Auntie Lila:”
One of the joys of being a Christian
is the gift of salvation in the Lord Jesus Christ with the absolute guarantee
of eternal life. So that the passing away of a loved one who knows the
Lord, indeed holds the hope that she is not simply dimmed of life, but in fact
passes onto a glorious immortal life with the Lord Jesus Christ in heaven.
Spiritually. Literally as well.
Recently a dear loved one passed away
to be with her Lord and although I grieve for her passing, I stay assured that
she is now in a better place with her Heavenly Father .
I dedicate this tribute to celebrate
the life of Dr. Nellie Cudal-Defensor. There are moments in life that are inexpressible and ineffable. This is such an instance. Words will fall
short of the very essence I would wish to express. Yet today, I invite you to
pause with me for a moment and celebrate the loving life God gave my Auntie
Lila, Dr. Nellie Cudal-Defensor.
Etymologically the word “celebrate” suggests synonyms in differing derivations as in Greek kleiein, “to tell of,” “to proclaim.”
In Lithuanian, grirui attached to the word ‘grace’ means “to praise,” and from the Latin root celebrare, assemble to honor.
Here’s in “celebrare,” to proclaim, to praise and to honor Auntie Lila’s life:
I Saw a Woman Today
I saw a woman today respond to the call of the
healing profession.
I saw a woman obedient to the command
of her craft,
like an artisan deftly skillful in
the tools of her trade
in her hands, meticulous, administering
preparing patients coping with
pain,
sobering soothing stressed bodies
with sweet sleep, temporal.
I saw a medical doctor today
navigating shifting sides of
professional practice
emotion and intellect
clinical, competent, at once caring
discerning , disciplined.
Restoring, hands healing.
I saw a physician today.
I saw a woman today
Respond to the call of charity,
LOVE that is.
Rescuing, reaching out , sharing
her gifts
Mentoring, nurturing,
guiding , giving counsel
Investing
in a long line of nieces &
nephews
Turning their lives around so that
they in turn
now answer the call serving the Lord
in nursing, nutrition, academia,
engineering,
visual , media, performing and other
fine arts,
banking & finance accounting,
biology, enterpreneurship, theology, evangelism, ministry and missions.
I saw a woman today
passing on love
in bundles of blessings
as in discipleship: to bless others
who may bless others to
bless others, to bless others, to
bless others…..
in infinite filial bond of blessings.
I saw a woman today
I saw Auntie Lila today!
- Written by Idrenne Lim- Alparaque, PhD